Lately, my life has been, at the least, interesting if not soap operatic…As my degree is in playwrighting, (which now I am pissed off because spell check is not recognizing playwrighting…but it recognizes wheelwright how many fucking wheelwrights have you heard of ?... but whatever) I decided to show just how my life is in a short piece…
Scene:
A busy, but small restaurant in a popular destination community for honeymooners such as Aruba. The well dressed Maitre D stand behind his lectern taking reservation on the phone on stage right. Stage left is a busy bar. Center stage are a few tables all with patrons. There is one booth wedged up beside the bar, stage left.
As I approach the lectern, he hangs up the phone.
Maitre D
May I help you?
Todd
Yes, I have a reservation. It's under Bitter.
Maitre D
(He checks)
I am sorry I don't see anything under that name? And when did you make the reservation?
Todd
(Sighs deeply) Yesterday about this time…I think I spoke to Seemingly Competent
Maitre D
Oh yes… let me double check with him
(picks up the phone and dials…)
Yes I have a gentleman here who claims to have spoken to you yesterday.. a Mr. Bitter…yes..Oh I see..Oh yes yes yes….now I see it… Thank You Seemingly…
I am so sorry Mr. Bitter…You see Seemingly is the Manager and rarely takes reservations…but we do have you here Mr. Bitter, table for one. It will be just a few moments; if you'd care to wait in the bar we will call you when your table is ready…
Todd
Thank you. (He goes to the bar and tries to get the bartender's attention with no avail. He leans up against the wall. After several moments of watching couples enter the bar and restaurant, the Maitre D' returns)
Maitre D
(in a distinctly loud voice)
Bitter, table of one…Bitter table of one?
(Todd goes to the maitre who escorts him to the booth crammed into the bar. He sits and looks at the menu for a few moments. A Waiter approaches)
Waiter
(Pouring water) Good afternoon…My name is Nearly and I will be your waiter today. We do have some specials today. Did you see them on your way in?
Todd
I did, tell me a little about the fulfillment…It sounds perfect.
Waiter
We have fulfillment that is served with a side of belonging, but unfortunately I just sold our last portion of that…But we do have contentment which is marinated in very nice tangy purpose sauce.
Todd
(Sighing over the fulfillment) No, I am allergic to purpose. I think I will have… let's see… happiness and could I get that without the commitments?
Waiter
Yes (pointing to the menu) its right here…"Perpetual disappointment"
Todd
That's perfect. I'll have that and a glass of straight gin to drink.
Waiter
I'll be right back with your drink, and it will be about 30-40 years for your meal.
(Full Black out)
Things that Rock:
Katie's Cafe in Ogunquit Maine
Hot summer days at the beach with friends
nights filled with peaceful slumber
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